This Lady's Had a Bad Back and She Couldn't Lose Weight - This is How I Remedied Both Issues

We do have to wonder how many illnesses or problems fall in this category. I had a lady who couldn't sleep in a bed anywhere. If it was a hotel, a friend's house or her own bed...........her back would flare up within hours of going to sleep. She also had a hard time losing weight as well. More on that later on in the story.

As an overcoming self-sabotage coach, I look for patterns. The pattern here was pretty simple. Go to bed, bad back. Go to bed, bad back. But there was more to this pattern. After complaining about her back pain, she would move toward the couch (wherever she was) and would then have a wonderful sleep. In the end, after further investigation, the pattern revealed itself. Sleep in a bed-bad back erupts-move to a couch-good sleep achieved. Her husband found this slightly inconvenient but loved his wife, so he approved of anything where she could find a better night's sleep. During trips and vacations, such odd sleeping behavior added some complexity to the routine, wherever they were.

This lady originally came to me about a weight issue, which was also impacting her life in a repetitively negative way. This lady just couldn't lose weight, no matter how hard she tried. I reviewed her diet, her habits, her exercise routine and sure enough.......there was no reason why she shouldn't be dropping the weight she wanted. As overcoming self-sabotage coaches, we use a 100-point questionnaire to flush out what past events are driving what's happening in the present day. 

Sure enough, not only did I discover why she was having trouble losing weight, I also discovered where the sleep problem was coming from as well. Although it appeared obvious to me, as to the root cause of these issues, sometimes the client themselves can't connect the dots because they're too deep inside the pattern.

Through her answers to the overcoming self-sabotage questionnaire, it became obvious that the mother (the sole provider of emotional security in the home, as the father had passed away) looked down upon women who took care of their physical body and physical appearance. According to the mother, any female that took pride in her physical appearance, was shallow and would never be welcome in her good graces. This repetitive message was so prolific in the family home over the years (in hundreds of different ways) that my client's nervous system and body were forced to make a very hard choice.

The body could hold onto the weight and stay in the mother's good graces, guaranteeing the mother's ongoing emotional support or the body could lose the weight, and face the harsh world alone. As the subconscious always does, it picked security over happiness. The subconscious decided to carry the extra weight, in order to signal the mother that the daughter wasn't one of those people who cared about their physical appearance. The subconscious will always pick safety and security, above happiness, peace and long-lasting satisfaction. That's how the subconscious is designed, and this is a foundational tenet of what we teach to all our overcoming self-sabotage coaching clients. You have to know the way your body and nervous system work plus learn how your behavior comes about......in order to master your future moving forward.

As for her bad back, in each and every bed she slept in, the answer stood out inside the questionnaire as well. This family were so strapped for money, there weren't enough beds for everyone in the family. This child was therefore forced to sleep on the couch, often with her mother right next to her, holding her tight throughout the night. To my client's subconscious, the bed was so foreign, and the couch so familiar (plus heavily associated with parental love and safety) only the couch would do. Although this pattern appeared obvious to me as her coach, she was actually shocked that she hadn't see the connection before. She laughed to herself out loud and said, "OMG, it's so obvious, this is so silly, I get it..."

That's where the healing journey starts for every client, with the overcoming self-sabotage coach pointing out the connections between what's happened in the past and what's happening in their present lives. After each issue is consciously explained to the client, only then are subconscious reprogramming modalities tabled and explained. It wasn't long before this nice lady would finally have a good night's sleep next to her husband in a regular bed, without her back acting up. Not long after that, her weight started to let go. (after some simple reprogramming therapies) The results that she should have been getting all along, started to manifest. Turns out her mother was thrilled that she was starting to take care of herself, and her husband was more thrilled to sleep in the bed together. The mother only wanted the best for her daughter and never intended to shame her for being her best. The super happy husband never even cared about the extra pounds, he just longed for having a good night's sleep with the woman he loved right next to him. In the end, it all worked out for everyone involved.

Becoming an overcoming self-sabotage coach is very rewarding and it's a fascinating field to study in. I offer a school that certifies overcoming self-sabotage coaches. April 26th, 2025, our 10th semester begins inside our new rapid fire certification process, which means you'll get everything wrapped up in only 8 weeks, as we conduct our usual 16 weeks program in only half the time. This way we're all out, ready to fully enjoy the summer, when it comes around. You can take this program online form anywhere in the world. You get to work with me personally and anyone can afford to secure their seat in the school, with our new payment plan. We have a 700-person strong social media network page, just for coaches and students to exchange support and valuable ideas together. Click here to learn more or email me immediately with any questions you may have at [email protected]. The class is filling up and we're about 14 days out at the moment. Let's get better together. I'll see you on opening day.